"My name is Tank Abbott and I'm going to be the most athletic person to ever step inside The Octagon." -The Tank
"He looks like just another pretty boy to me and I don't like pretty boy's" Tank Abbott talking about Frank Mir.
“After a match, my opponent goes to the hospital and gets an IV, and I have a martini.” - Tank Abbott
“You know, I just went from the barstool to the Octagon.” - Tank Abbott
“You get on Queer Street…you make a right turn…you’re back to Main.” - Tank Abbott
“Beating people up is a positive thing.” - Tank Abbott
“Okay. Right here, I’m tickling his brain.” - Tank Abbott while watching a replay in which he presses his opponent’s head into the cage.
“Isn’t that the guy on the coffee can?” - Tank Abbott on his Brazilian opponent, Hugo Duarte.
“I don’t think much of Tito Ortiz. He needs to grow balls and sign to fight Chuck Liddell.” - Tank Abbott
“I’m gonna win this tournament because I am the most athletic fighter in it.” - Tank Abbott
“I dreamed that I was being raped by Freddy Mercury.” - Tank Abbott after losing to Dan Severn.
“When I go in there, I’m not going in there to win. I’m going in there to fight.” - Tank Abbott.
"My hobby is drinking." - Tank. "My book leads up to the 18 months where I went to jail for beating up a cop’s son. Then I got out of jail and fought in the UFC. It is kind of a real‑life Rocky story." - Tank.
"I said I just got out of jail for beating somebody up, in fact, a cop’s son. Isn’t this supposed to be about fighting? And they said, yeah, but you’ve got to have some kind of a black belt or something. And I said that’s not what I’m about. I’m about fighting in the streets." - Tank Abbott.
"Who Cares about Bas Rutten?" -Tank Abbott.
"I don’t see it going any other way. I can do anything I want to him, but what fun is that? I like to knock people out." - Tank Abbott.
"Doesn’t matter. I can go 15 minutes holding my breath standing on my head. So it could be the 14th minute or the first minute, whenever he runs into one." - Tank Abbott.
“What? Did he just win the Olympics?” - Tank Abbott after the crowd goes wild during a match. "I kind of like that. I don’t like beating up people in my hometown. I like to go to their hometown, so they can see what they’re all about." - Tank Abbott.
“He who fights and runs away lives to fight another day and looks like a pussy today.” - Tank Abbott. "I don’t drink beer. I can afford vodka." - Tank Abbott.
“I’ll bet he wishes he had that other pectoral muscle right about now.” - Tank Abbott commenting on Tra Telligman’s TKO loss. Telligman lost one pectoral muscle due to a childhood accident.
"Tito's forehead is so big that he can smoke in the rain!" - Tank.
“In a real fight in a bar, you wouldn’t be able to lay on your back like a bitch. You might catch a pool cue to the back of the head.” - Tank Abbott
“I’m starting to get sexually aroused right now. You better get that off.” - Tank Abbott after watching a replay of his knockout of John Matua.
“The first thing that makes you a tough fighter is in your head and in your heart, then your tools. It has nothing to do with someone teaching you how to be tough.” - Tank Abbott
“Here’s where I hit him with the light switch.” - Tank Abbott commenting on his knockout of Steve Nelmark.
“Let me tell you something about the ground game and jiu-jitsu. All you un-athletic people out there, you know this for a fact. Little kids learn jiu-jitsu. Women learn jiu-jitsu. You don’t have to be an athlete to know jiu-jitsu. You have to be an athlete to wrestle in college or walk into a boxing gym and have competitive boxing matches and fight people. You just have to be a bitch and lay on your back to know jiu-jitsu. I mean, come on. It’s the truth.” - Tank Abbott
“All of a sudden, Magnum P.I. has got an attitude.” - Tank Abbott on Dan Severn
“He was in an ambulance on the way to the hospital, while I was laughing about it at the bar, having some cocktails.” - Tank Abbott
“I’m looking forward to Glamrock and, uh, Freddie Mercury.” - Tank Abbott on the upcoming match between Ken Shamrock and Dan Severn.
"Where's Don the Dragonfly Wilson? Probably filming a Godzilla voiceover that'll be seen at 3 in the morning."-- Tank Abbott.
"I was doing this when the prize was going to jail not winning belts." - Tank Abbott's philosophical opinion on fighting.
Joe Rogan: "Who would you like to fight?" - Tank Abbott: "Right now, you. This ain't Fear Factor, Joey." Insert non-formatted text here